Well, this sums it all up nicely

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Laugh(ing) out loud ... still

This comic panel wins the award! I don't know what award but it wins. Hands down.


I'm still giggling and snorting. My nose hurts—perhaps it has to do with the hot tea that came out through my nostrils.

I will no longer struggle to come up with the right word. This gives me permission to just insert the type of word that I need, not an actual word.

Comic panel from Dog Eat Doug (c) Brian Anderson

What time is it?

Who: Flight of the Conchords
What: a post dedicated to Amelia
Why: she said she liked the idea of feety-pjs; this gives her another reason to do so
What do you mean? Listen for the line about socks and all will become clear, Grasshopper.

No kidding?

File this under Headline of the Day (though I'm not done with the Sunday paper yet)

Speedo Now Selling LZR Racer Swim Suit to the Public, U. S. Whale Sightings Way Up

-- seen at Gizmodo

Is there a prize for this?

So I'm thinking of using a wiki in one of my classes this fall. Generally, I'm motivated by the "why one when many" model of information delivery. More specifically, since I never know where the next calculator question is going to come from, the students could work from their collective knowledge. Sounds good in theory. Post what you know, it is more than I could ever tell you.

Problem one with the theory is where does the wiki wiv, er, live. One option is at pbwiki. While surfing throught the employee information, I found the following:

Lynn Wu got her undergraduate degree in Golf and Sports Turf Management. She won silver in the biathlon in Torino. She also took on Wolverine on American Gladiators. Coming in at 6 feet 4 inches, Lynn keeps the PBwiki team in line with her amazon-like ferocity. In her spare time Lynn enjoys LOLcatting, practicing the art of bowyery, and writing fake biographies.

I'm leaning toward pbwiki as the external host for the class wiki if only because the upper-level mucky-mucks are cool with this and see amazon-like ferocity as a plus.

Updated 12:40 PM — The tagline for EditMe: "geek tested, newbie approved" is also a useful measure of quality.

Protect your valuable stuff

Hmm, was there some sort of problem for which this was the answer?

IM ;)-ing @ U

His name is Nick Thune.

Church of the Calorie

From the Department of Can't Make This Stuff Up

An organization on campus whose mission is to empower young women was the beneficiary of a fundraising event sponsored by the local chapter of the League of Women Voters. Since I myself am empowered by my iPhone and always having the internet in my pocket, I fired off a google search for info on the fundraiser. All I knew was that it involved chili and a small donation. I needed time and location.

Third on the list of google hits was the local Hamlet Picayune and the seemingly limitless community calendar. My finger cramped from all the scrolling I had to do in search of my singular event. I'm not sure how items were sorted but there was a separate category for Calendar and Meetings, with subsets of music, art tours, receptions, and openings, theater, dance, events, readings & lectures, classes, talks & demonstrations ... and then upcoming deadlines for more happenings if you haven't dropped over dead already. It is a massive listing and I really have to hand it to the paper for posting every little thing that comes their way. If you're bored around here it is your own damn fault.

Anyway, I found my event. It is happening in the same church hall as the following two events, listed in this order in the calendar (only the saint has been changed to protect the innocent):

• Overeaters Anonymous. 10-11:30 a.m. St. Food's Church, 525 N. Fifth Ave. 555-8753.
• Greet & Eat. 11:45 a.m. St. Food's Church, 525 N. Fifth Ave. Free meals for needy and hungry. 555-4862.

Below this was an announcement for a gluten awareness group, which—due to contextual miscues—I read as "glutton awareness group." Thankfully, they are meeting at a separate location.

Can you imagine the scene in the parking lot of the Church of the Calorie between 11:30 and 11:45 a.m.? Furthermore, I think it is very considerate to have these disparate groups assigned their own phone extensions for more information. Heaven forbid a hungry person be mistaken for an obese person over the phone.

By the way, the chili was excellent.

Almost Peed Myself

Not because I was wearing these and couldn't get them unlaced in time:


but because I read this. Nothing but funny.

(FYI: I'm blogging commando.)

What I Found Today

I'm fried. We're only three weeks into the quarter and mentally I'm toast. I have nothing else to say to y'all but wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and your internet needs. Enjoy these finds.

Three Philosophies.
Found at tweebiscuit.net

Honey, could you bring in some wood for the fire?
Found at the artist's site.


What happens when eBay, Amazon, Google and MySpace show up at a party....
The Internet Party, at Cracked.com

Old pictures, new taglines. Brilliant.
Married to the Sea


What I won't be doing on the long weekend: going for an infinite walk. Check out the movie to see how this path was made.


Either someone has too much time on their hands or some whiz-kid in marketing has earned a vacation and a promotion. Hilarious. Click to see the rest of the book, the newsflash, etc.

Far be it for me to argue

---
Why are you looking down here? That caption wasn't enough for you?

Stuck on the Dark Side

When the Jedi Steve teamed up with the Dark Side to get a revolutionary new light saber, phone, iPod, email and web surfing device to the minions, I thought those who think different could rejoice. I thought maybe those consumed by evil could be convinced to close the Windows and come around to the side of good. Apparently I rejoiced too quickly. Here's a shot from inside a Death Star franchise:


Found at Gizmodo

Almost made coffee come out my nose

Today's giggle:



The video itself made me laugh but not as hard as the fact that some technician in the studio kept playing the clip over and over. As the first gent demonstrates, the job of the talking heads is to explain the obvious. When the giggles start to hit, somebody kept replaying the tape. That's the part I find especially hilarious.

Questions, always questions

I've been putting this post off for a while because I have no idea how you follow "Nice web, Mr. Crack Spider" without lowering the bar.

Question of the day: does Seattle have a comic book analogue? Gotham City is architecturally designed in the style of New York City. There really is a Metropolis in Illinois, as well as comically both in Kansas and on the eastern seaboard. You are not worthy to wear the bracelets if you don't know that Wonder Woman hails from Themyscira and originally landed in Boston. Central City, home of The Flash, is in Ohio, Florida, and in Missouri on the Kansas border, across from Keystone City, home of, uh, The Flash. Keystone City also has a history of being a blue-collared town so placing it in Pennsylvania, the Keystone State and home to many mines and mills, is also plausible. No worries about finding or not finding Coast City, home of the Green Lantern Hal Jordan, since its total destruction plummeted Hal into madness. It may have been in northern California, near Star City, home of Green Arrow, which has also been located near the Great Lakes and Massachusetts Bay.

Oliver Queen, aka Green Arrow, did live in the Pacific Northwest for a time, hence the donning of a protection-from rain hood rather than that oh-so-cute Robin Hood cap. Which brings us full circle back to my question: Does Seattle have a comic reference, some fictional city used as a stand-in for a city here in meatspace?

Since it is raining outside and we have plenty of time to ponder today, I'll leave you with another question: why does no one ever want to play the part of Luke?

Savage Chickens are copyrighted by Doug Savage.

More educational movies: I'm Joe's ... Spider ?!?

I must have been sick the day they showed this educational movie about drugs.

I can't be alone with this

I have tried and tried to keep this stuff to myself. Alas, I can not hold back any longer. Brace yourself.

Two sisters mailed a hot dog to each for 54 years
The same hot dog? For over half a century? And the only thing you can think to ask me right now is if I want onions on mine?

Cadaver Calculator
My own body is worth almost $4000. Hmm, that's only eight iPhones.

Boomshine
This game should be called Blow Up You $%^&#%& Bubbles!!! Do NOT start playing this "addictive ... casual" game unless you have some time to kill or papers to avoid writing or a fresh nappy on the wee one. It's Flash crack. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Verify our position with one ping only, Vasily.

About Face
Flash is all the rage for internet games (see above) and animation. Flash, I would like you to make your ancestor: crayons on paper. This is very cool animation, the old school way.

Pizza Delivery, extra spicy
You want WHAT on your pizza? Canada is looking better and better every day.



Any ideas on what this sign might mean:



A pair of shoes to go with every outfit—even the bikini! I predict these will be in some future Bond 007 movie, unless my posting them here has caused them to jump the shark already.



Honey, where's the remote?



If this is what the ATM said, we'd all be saving more money.

I'm Joe's Beer

Am I the only one who remembers those educational flicks shown in elementary school, like I'm Joe's Heart, produced by Disney or some Disney-clone? I know this particular film lasted for over an hour, but all I remember from Heart is that, if you must sit for a long period of time now that you've acquired a white-collar job since you've come home from the war, sitting with your feet up helps get the blood back where it belongs: your butt. I also have a somewhat random memory cell imprinted with Goofy telling Mickey he keeps his car tires' air pressure low because he thinks that gives him a softer ride. I believe future Ford and Firestone executives were also raised on this movie.

Anyhow, not to be outdone, the beer industry also has some educational movies out there. Well, OK, I don't know if there are plural movies but the one I found is a fantastic piece of propaganda! I believe it can be summarized thusly: Without beer, civilization would not have happened. Without beer taxes, the government couldn't meet the budget. Without honest folks to serve beer and police themselves, the prude side of the Force will bring another Prohibition. The main thing I learned is that there is a Beer Institute. This lobbying group exists, apparently, to inform the public that the 4th of July is the biggest beer day on the calendar as well as to collect other fascinating beer facts and statistics.

All this pondering about the benefits of beer has made me thirsty. I'm sure it's happy hour somewhere so I'm off to hoist one.

Nothing says "civilization" like a serving tray,
men in ties, and women in hats.

What did that mime say?

Those of you out there who simply love mimes or are teaching your child sign language so that s/he can tell you when diaper needs a-changin' should check this out:




Then head over to Neatorama and check out the whole set. I particularly like the last one where the singer, Natalie Imbruglia, joins him in a duet. Quite nice. Clearly lip-synched but quite nice.

The ad campaign worked

I know what my next car is going to be and I know why.
Well, I can add the ad campaign to the list of reasons why. Consider it the icing on the hood.





In case you can't read the text, they say:
Still looking for weapons of mass destruction. Not Smart.
Interns and cigars. Not Smart.
Pissing off junior and senior Bush. Not Smart.

My new current favorite web comic

You gotta love a site that says...

Warning: this comic occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors).

... and has comics to boot!



Check it out at XKCD